TedEd . choices . possibilities and dead ends

There are times when you just can't stop yourself but spend time online, for better or worse, and for half a year now of my freelancing life I've spent my entertainment quality watching days of this freelancing life blood soaked in the world of Youtube channels. Luckily, for me, I've got friends with good taste for channels in comparison to my simple self who just bases it's own personal preference of decisions with sometimes shallow reasons, a.k.a. looks and probably day to day articles of life, except for pranks, my current self doesn't really enjoy those prank videos in it's entirety. Maybe in a different part of my life I might, either grow or just suddenly learn how to like prank videos. Any case, I've stumbled upon my better in current relationship half a video from one of it's plurk feed. This better half's video was from TedEd.

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I've yet to discover the origins of TedEd but I do know that the videos in the channel are, true to their slogan, worth sharing into this world of ours. Preferably a general knowledge type of channel. The videos are all animated by different types of groups / animators in accordance to the topic being read at hand. However, I am not here to further promote their well made life lesson sharing videos but focus on one video that got me tugging into a topic I would probably state afterwards.

Hedonism is one word I've completely forgotten what the meaning was, although there is this niggling thought in my head that it had something to do with something selfish.

The video focuses on the idea "what if you we're given the choice to choose only experiencing the ups of life". It further exemplifies and theorizes scenarios basing from the choices in ones life depending on the situation. Examples like the one on the video, which is common in everyday life scenes, it's a sort of probability thought until proven (unless you haven't watched the video, the scenario stated was: a woman is deeply in love with a man, but the man was secretly wooing the woman's sister; is it better for the woman to discover the truth and delve in the pain or dismiss it and indulge in the fantasy that they are the perfect couple).

This got me thinking about my life recently. That pertaining to my choice path of career. I've been freelancing for one year now taking on various graphic design jobs, like being a Shirt Art Designer, Graphic Artist, Caricature Artist, Book Layout Artist, and others related to Illustration and Publishing. However, I've been in a rise and fall slump, having more reasons where I have minimal profit although I have a lot of work. The freedom of choosing and developing my profession as an artist however is part of this life, although it's slow and quite unproductive, sad to say, most of the time.

Recently a relative of mine has begun to make it their mission to help me in finding a work career as it seems that my current one is too pitiful to watch. Even having hear them describe it as I was "the type of person that sleeps all day and needed other people to open up their choices in career to be able to move on from their current slump" (not exactly the words said since they we're spoken in our language, plus the words might be twisted because I don't really know how to translate it nicely in english, lol). Although the end thought is, the current one I have isn't working out well. That in itself my growth is considerably slow to nil. Probably, for their eyes.

After hearing such and watching the video attached, was my choice of work path something akin to a level of hedonism? Stating, I enjoy my current freedom in freelancing and, although slow, happy even to the point of proud that I can have time doing jobs that my skill set can offer for specific clients.

Although this doesn't prove anything hedonistic, speaking. Since for a part I have not mentioned anything that states I have neither experienced nor have any painful things to feel, which in reality isn't true.

This has now become a list of rant and things about the pains I see in my life, the ones I've clearly known but push away in hopes to give me self-esteem, confidence and even the driving force to move into the direction of the path I am currently "courageously" weaving. Presently a clear proof that I lack any qualifications to be hedonistic in nature.

A mighty conclusion for this is something that I should decide for myself. The video isn't something that gave me some providence like way of clearing the clouds, but it sure did add another batch of wild flowers on the half barren pasture I'm positive is a good field to spend time being happy with given enough time and good sources of care and growing.

Jacksfilms . YGS 100 movie . why grammar is important, personally

I've gotten myself acquainted well into Jacksfilms, a youtuber that I encountered during my time watching a marathon of all of Onisions videos that I found interesting.  (so Jack; basically, me getting to your channel is kinda thanks to Greg; LOL)

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His channel is a barrage of sketches borderline comedic satire to just plain sarcasm (did I just separate one term into two terms that are actually the same in essence, well who cares). Stating the reason, due to his popular sketches YIAY (Yesterday I Asked You) and YGS (Your Grammar Sucks), which majority of his viewers appreciate the most. Guessing they have the same mocking humour as the maker himself, not that I'm any different, ho-ho-homies.

During my time as his viewer, I encountered a recurring comment about a movie he's making that would celebrate the 100th episode of YGS. That every episode of YIAY, which was the only active content he seems to be doing, commenters mentions the movie all the time. Of course, not missing a note to follow the rules, or something, in answering his question for the day. It's actually amazing how diversely creative his subscribers are.

Personally I didn't expect much from YGS, cause the content sometimes just gives me excruciating headaches. Meaning that somehow my mind can't run normally because of comprehensive reasons. The grammar or satire replies posted in the videos of YGS.

I don't really like every how horrible the replies featured in each episode, but the quality of how Jack delivered the content was one of the top reasons why the segments became tolerable. That in itself says much about what kind of entertainer and creative person he is.

Watching YGS 100 movie, almost an hour long or more, was the first YGS that I actually watched TILL THE END. This fact, plus how I tried listening to the content, which was A-grade "imho"; is a first. The first time I actually focus in a YGS and it's an hour long, almost, movie. Insert "lol" icon.

The diversity of the youtubers who participated plus all the content juice that must've taken Jack, like, tons of several (redundant) of sweat, blood and tears to edit the whole of it was amazing. Why, I'm singing praises for the video. Yet, my only critic is that he could've just not made the whole movie, and every segment of the movie be something of a daily or twice a day post. Really, just that he compiled the whole thing was my only nitpick. Insert "lol" icon here.

Over all, I would recommend it, only if it's already broken down to the every segment tiny pieces before anyone should watch it. But, it is entertaining. That won't be taken from Jacksfilms content.

...I just realized I didn't say anything about why grammar is important to me, personally (redundant). Well, that can be for the future something, cause YGS 100 itself expressed the very sentiment of why it's important. (even though I'm effin imperfect myself about grammar, at least I'd want a tried your best badge)

Podcasts . Reality . Variation of it

I've been trying to explore different kinds of podcast channels lately, ranging from crime scenes to game related, something of a short range for my taste. Of course the range of choices won't go beyond what peaks my interest. Laughable as how low my thirst for discovery is at least I found interesting ones.

(Although as I have stated several times in my short span of listening to such things, I end up not fully listening to a lot of episodes due to my brain not withstanding that unpleasant weirdo head ache from so much information. Carrying on...)

The first podcast channel I've ever gotten into was the ever famous "Welcome to Nightvale", due to their interesting world and how sci-fi slash supernatural everything is in their realm. Eventually I've gone and just gotten myself bored of it, even though I go back to it every now and then just to have a good different content to listen to. Don't get me wrong, WTNV is a truly wonderful experience, not including the Cecil-Carlos (or any other) fandom mind you. The realm of Nightvale is mysterious and intriguing, something out of the dream box and just up and out with the normalcy of life. How the morbid can just be something as pleasant as a newly baked pie, without it being overly anything in particular.

WTNV is truly a kudos, something I really am thankful for, especially introducing me to the joys of story based podcast. Even if its comparable to radio dramas, to this i LOL.

Next, after immersing myself to a lot of Jeff Clement stuff from Aural Stimulations, which by the way-ing of the ways a very inspiring experience to Jeffs' production talent, is the Selected Shorts community.

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LINK TO SOUNDCLOUD

Selected Shorts is probably the best cup of tea I have ever found. Their aim, to feature short stories or excerpts from selected works by acclaimed, budding or just plain preferred authors.

To me, the Selected Shorts community will be something of a dream. I've enjoyed my life when I was younger telling stories and doing dramas just by the aural kind. Good voice acting, or modulation, or just plain voice it self is captivating in it's way.

Although some story tellers in the podcast was kind of bland to my ears, it didn't hinder me to the wonder of the stories content. Hearing that tinge of enthusiasm which to my thinking probably might be not in their at all and just me hearing things. That is just the grandeur of it, how deceivingly pleasant our minds are. However I am not joking when I do hear how enthusiastic and clear their voices are in telling stories they didn't even write. Which to me I completely understand, especially if they loved the book they were reading.

Next we've got the famous Serial, according to all those blogs I read about good lists of podcast channels. They weren't wrong, just a tad celebrated, but the content of this mystery-drama podcast is good. Better to the ears of my friend though. I just hope she doesn't go and do a thing I do sometimes when I don't like the voice casting or background sound. Quitting half of the story.

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LINK TO SOUNDCLOUD

The scenarios though is gripping enough mind you. The investigation and social interaction of the detective (lets just say I nailed the lead voices' character) throughout is good. Just I don't  like listening to the episodes in one go, refer to reason in first enclosed in parenthesis statement.

Up next is another cup of my tea, I am getting well caffeinated in my journey for good podcast channels, in the name of Imaginary Worlds. A podcast by Eric Molinsky, and yes I remembered to edit the name (victory pose, cause it used to say Simon-something...).

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LINK TO SOUNDCLOUD

The channel is dedicated to the realm of observational opinions on selected topics under geek-dom. The geek-dom type I can follow, like RPG related games, comics, movies from comics, anything under the sun of the established geek-dom I am slightly well acquainted. Not in a manner of specifics.

He discusses his adventures in the world of Tabletop RPG games, that I never really got the hang of until now, some discussion on trending in the loop of society topics and so on. His inputs are agreeable and some of the people and topics he discuss are the things I rarely hear about, which is good!

My selection isn't too bad but I need more input to fully get the brunt of their content. The type of full content that either enriches me, in a way that maybe one day it would help me while hoping that I won't forget the content in a blink of an eye.

fun watch . Geek & Sundry . Spooked

Currently I'm enjoying myself in an old YT series under Geek & Sundry entitled Spooked.

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It's a 2014 supernatural comedy about the wonderful drama filled humane adventures of a five group of adults, with one kid as the fifth member.

The show seems to try the unique mash up of unusual tropes, which I found quite interesting in itself. Of course it wouldn't be a comedy that didn't twist the nipples of mainstream stereotypes that seems to swim everywhere, starting with the group itself. Even though there are stereotype roles for each, not that I'm saying that my taste for the uniqueness is shallow (might be...I can't really say...*further pondering*), they blend well that the chemistry of the characters are profoundly prominent and eye catching for viewers (in my humble ow-pee).

The leader that did his job due to righteous underlying sister relation issues concerning his little sister recovering fairly well when the supernatural is involved. Matched up with his completely awkward and morbid asian best friend, crushing on the blonde occult specialist that did not reciprocate said feelings. Rounding it up with the science buff, that one guy who amidst all the evidences would not admit defeat in believing the unknown unless solid evidence is recorded.

The scenarios are the common exorcisms, ghost haunting, the occasional poltergeist and some other mash up from the everyday story of horror movie like. Except in the blight of all this serious issues is the manner of which selected characters dealt with the story. Like a little bit of all the Scary Movie parodies.

Scratch that little bit and make it all over the place method like the Scary Movies parody.

The show was enjoyable. Snippets of everyday life challenges, like sibling relationships, best friends, romance, come to think of it these life challenges were overly conventional that it made the whole show human amidst the horror that never scared the shit out of anyones pants. Good thing such horror exist in the world.

The only thing that might be truly lacking is the plots challenge through out the episodes. Everything was engaging and interesting in a normal point of view, since I guess the aim was just fun during horror times. Yet, yearning to have that plot about a greater scare is what I was waiting for.

Which they did do by the last episode. This is one of those stories I see that just sucks my soul for being satisfied and want me to yearn for some more. Marketing purposes they have succeeded. Other sections of my life just wants to say in a convincing manner to be patient and wait and see when they will give a new season.

(trailer released in June 2014)

Speaking of second season for this show, there seems to be no other new if there will be one. There were mentions of it during it's time of airing but somehow the show must have not garnered enough attention and audience during the release, and like all the other sadly bad timed shows they got the bunk. Never to be seen again.

With the same set of characters and actors, or actresses...(etc., rambling commences).

Inevitable . Antisocial? . Onision universe

This may sound weird, but people who give advice and has an official title to give so for specific parts of life in general is respected. You gain a sliver of trust due to that established societal method of acceptance, which I pertain is the title acquired from years of studying and practice.

The issue I see here is the distribution of or who you choose to trust.

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Recently I've been smothering myself with Onision videos, specifically his outspoken opinions about topics he is asked in his website or forums under the YT channel Onisionspeaks. I collectively view all his videos in that channel as his point of view alone and to whoever gives a fuck and for his fans or listeners, they're free to listen to it. Listen, regardless of whether his opinion or conclusion to the topic would match the listeners P.O.V. or not.

Again, since I'm kind of immersing myself with stuff about him, I tried going back to some of his videos disregarding all the questionable and dramatic content. Curiosity is one thing that won't be taken from man I tell you.

I discovered one of his life dramas, namely the one about his ex-girlfriend Shiloh. Who I discovered is a singer before she got involved with Onision, lets just call him Greg. (In context with Shiloh, I like her music. I hope she comes back, as I hear she hasn't done any since 2005/9(?). Kudos to her career)

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That sources' article is funny, but intriguing *shrug*.

I do not like or patronize the action of posting too personal stuff online, since I am generally a private person. But, come on, who doesn't like the drama (and it's the person who's posting the private thing is the one at fault for deciding it generally). Any-many, I saw a lot of mental and emotional stuff enough for me to re-watch it just to confirm that what I heard was what I heard. 

Messy and sad comes into my mind. Greg's choice on how to handle his problem, involving the opinion of several people who is allowed to view his videos made me think every single break up he has gone to is just an act. But who am I to be confirmed of this, personally I'm not going to go deeper, but it was sad.

Moving on to that sad thing is the tons of criticism he received with his "advices". I watched one video, from KSicFlip, about Greg giving an advice to one of his patrons who is thinking of killing their self because of their abusive mother (got a shock that the Onision video linked in reaction video I watched is incorrect, or sort of incorrect since their wasn't even any mention of suicide, but KSicFlip must be just generalizing the whole style of how Onision advices). KSicFlip is against Greg's words in the video. Later maybe I would post the video of the critic for me to remember everything (I did!).

Personally, the only thing I did want to say was, everyone has selective anything. And to me the person who made the criticism just did selective anything. I remember listening to the video, and I know Greg noted in the middle of the video, at the end of some parts of what he said and at the end of the video itself that the only method is to ask for help that's why he pointed out the hotlines.

That's the only thing I want to point out, and possibly the only thing I saw that Greg wanted to pin. However I do agree with the critics other words, giving advice on holding on ones life and trying to take a hold of it and stuff, when I heard Greg say those things I remember myself when I give advice to some of my friends who have issues about something.

I know I'm just spouting words to give them a smidgen of confidence for them from what they feel. But it doesn't mean we're dismissing the severity of the situation when we say it, and if the situation does need help greater than a boost of life confidence giving them information they need that might help is the next best thing.  I do feel guilty of saying it to them harshly, but I had good intentions to the person. However it wasn't her cup of coffee, it hurts that they perceive it differently but I can't control what anyone would think once I spout the words I intend to help (defensive, eeeeey!).

I guess each one has their own opinion that they know can help, same as with the KSicFlip and the one Greg gave to the person who asked help. But in the end these are just words and options given to the person who needs it.

Personally I'd rather look for it myself, especially if it's gonna be hard to decide when you hear peoples opinion of the situation. Sadly not every single being rolls like each one, so as a small whisper of hope for the good that they get to stand and decide it for themselves whatever the method. Or you can just go end everything. Not much choice if one person begins to think drastically towards the brink of life. (reason why people act involuntary acts of kindness, but thats another story)

Edit: Kinda realized this is a slightly biased rant for the side of Onision more? Oh, well, hypocrite and a fan *shrug*. What can I say.

OnisionSpeaks >> join him

jacksepticeye . appreciation . mundane

These days, after my sickness horror and now my paranoid head trying to recover from "something", I've recently spent my ass watching on youtube tons of videos that would and could entertain me in a sense. As I have said before I am completely new in the realm of youtube and so far I have neither that many of subscriptions to anyone nor any content on my youtube(would never dream of putting anything in it, besides playlists and personal entertainment stuff from other awesome people).

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The first youtuber I spend myself wasting my day and watching videos was from Pewdiepie, as I said before as well. Now I have at least five or tons more added in my list of youtubers and currently on my top of the list is Jacksepticeye.

Theres a reason why I like him now more than Poods, besides being bored now of watching some of Poods old videos that doesn't interest me anymore. Its the reality that Sean, his real name, has unique or taste that are slightly inclined towards the same taste as two of my close friends, and my boyfriend. That attracted me to his videos, till I immersed into most of it that wasn't a constructing or science technical game.

His taste for games and eagerness feels genuine, plus I really liked his style, being all over or loud as EF. There is no comparing in reality, his style is unique that people appreciates the uniqueness. He isn't intentionally rude or abrasive or aggressive towards his fellow game youtuber, and like them is quite eager. Plus he has a segment that catches everyones hearts, the Read Your Comments. Which is very practical interaction with his fans.

Also I think I like him because I'm attracted to his charm, cannot deny that. Because I only like a minimal of the games he's played through. As I said his taste is like the same with my boyfriend and two of my close friends. Something that is a plus to my radar.

At this point, I think I understand why most of their fans now are generally thankful and very clingy to the existence of their videos, towards game youtubers I mean. And it's true, even I am thankful for his efforts in keeping up with something arduous as editing a video and spending time to play a game through to its fullest. That is one effort I miss doing.

Now I can't play any game to the fullest anymore, I don't think my level of patience will allow me to do so since my time to do work would lessen. The reality of being an adult.

Jacksepticeye >> join him

cartoon list: Clone High (drama, comedy)

There was this "craving" of some kind, like a hole in my heart that I wanted to be filled in by any of the encountered titles I wanted to watch but never got the chance to due to <list reason and excuses that doesn't include laziness> before. Reviewing my sources back (that random video about the top list of things and stuff, from WatchMojo), I remember wanting to watch old school cartoons from way back or not so way back. Just any cartoon show that I can sink my teeth in. Eventually out weighing the number of candidates in my list, the top was won over by Clone High.

The story is about a society where several of the residents are clones of famous or infamous people of history. The setting of the series is in a typical American like town where theres that rural home living, several schools for each district, that usual school life works.

The whole idea was actually cool, even the blunt and satirical stereotype personalities and characteristic all given to the famous names in the roster of main characters. Abraham Linclon as an awkwardly dense teen of immense height proportions, displaying his sense of good in the most absurd of moments whilst mockingly displaying his great flaws as a teen in modern age. Joan of Arc nearly not as cool as her counterpart in history, gaining even a helpless romantic clinginess onto her best friend, Abe. And alot of other irrationally modern and parody like traits given to several greatly famous icons of history.

Obviously everything in the premise of this cartoon show is parody filled. From its genre to the use of the utensils of epic convenience and quick cash scheme proportion. The show however was short lived for various butt hurt from many sources reason. I can't blame them, having your countries well beloved icon in history sport a fucking brass on being highly stupid and high on several occasions of the show. There is however several redeeming glory for this cartoon show. Besides the awesome opening theme, that I just biased-ly like due to reasons of preference.

The show delivers absurd messages that many a youngsters would be able to drink well, even if the heightened sexual hormones all over the place concerns me for a very good reason. I am a well grown conservative of things, albeit a believer of letting things be if needed. The show had its moments of sanity and well thought of topics which concerns alot of what can be pinpointed as a problem in our society. Like eco-friendly topics on littering, drug abuse, emotional hormone conflicts, subtle sexual orientation preferences and beliefs, even a slight pinch of religion.

Yet what makes this show shine the most for me is how insanely relevant it is on a scale, and the question of "what if" on what the historical icons would have in our modern times. I know the show doesn't really answer the "what if", since there are several probabilities on what their lives would have been "if" they were cloned.

This show wins for me on a scale and for the future kids of this generation its an ideal show to force them to watch because of insane but fairly relevant beneficial for their brains development reasons.

music . help . cringe

Just what has been happening lately in our local world. One. Word. HELP.
Or Cringe.

I've just recently encountered some post through my facebook feed about an article mentioning that a group of girls are getting their lime light of fame. Honestly I don't really know who they are and frankly I don't care, or wish I didn't try and know about it. *cringe*

The brain of yours truly doesn't really have any profound knowledge of the local music industry, I'm talking about the music industry of the Philippines specifically. Further more focusing on the "entertainment" music industry, as usual, they pick fancy funny songs that more or less catches the attention of the masses by, between the two, being absurdly annoying publicity or fairly in the line of worthy catchiness publicity.

The song I've encountered is more on the absurdly annoying side of fame.

The song is in our native tongue, and I think this is not the original version of it(I...am not sure, further research are all in halt due to the cringe capacity we can only receive in one go, it. is. too. much!).

Officially in this version it was sung by a comedian actor named Vice Ganda(gay, in every fibre of his being), which is by the way the type of satire comedian that absurdly jokes about almost anything or everything and nonchalantly says apologies when someone gets sore because its just a joke. Don't get me wrong here, I like some of his acts, but to be honest he's a satirical comedian with an almost obnoxious air. What could possibly go wrong!? Ha...Ha...

The song is titled "Wag Kang Pabebe" which roughly translates to "Don't Be Spoiled", or something akin to that. Honestly, the lyrics itself, although slang and forcibly poetic, isn't that bad. The meaning is clear, and its "modernistically" sensible. Just, not my cup of tea for the whole composition.

Anyways, my purpose slash challenge for myself today is to translate the whole song in english. Not in the same poetic way as it was composed but in literal terms.

Because! I feel like its going to be funny, especially if one tries to sing it in the tune with the video.

Lyrics:
Tagalog (English)

ang puti ng powder sa kanyang mukha (overly white powder on the face)

ang lipstick ay pulang pula, labi parang namamaga (lipstick too red, lips as if sore)

maririnig maya-maya (hearing later on)

pa-english, tag-lish habang nagseselfie (speaking in english, tag-lish, while taking a selfie)

syang pa-side view at nakatitig sa kanyang ganda (facing side view and staring at her beauty)

biglang nagsalita (suddenly she spoke)

oh gutom pala! (oh she's hungry!)

kumakalam na ang sikmura kung anu-anung inuna (stomach grumbling, doing other things first)

mag mamon ka nga (you eat mamon)

nakaka turn-off ka (you are such a turn off

asikasuhin pag-aaral (study first)

sayang ang matrikula (tuition waste)

huwag kang pabebe! (don't be spoiled!)

huwag kang pabebe (don't be spoiled)

huwag, huwag kang pabebe (don't ever be spoiled)

(chorus) [repeat]

hey miss miss miss excuse me please!

dumadami na mga pabebe, boom panis! (there are already many who are spoiled, boom rotten!)

labi mong matulis para bang nang-iinis (already sharp lips that seems to tease)

oh, bebe jan sa singet mo baka kita matiris (oh, spoiled you, i might pinch your groin) 

(verse 1)

miss miss miss excuse me please!

may inuutos pa ang nanny mo kaya bilis (you still have your mothers errand)

nu'ng kaartehan sinabog sa metropolis (when being pretentious was thrown in the metropolis) 

bakit mo sinalo? tuloy daming katalo! (why did you catch it? there are alot of enemies!)

(verse 2)

(chorus) [repeat]

pabebe di lang pambabae (being spoiled isn't just for girls)

may lalaking makikita mo sa videong (there are boys you can see taking videos)

tume-twerk it parang "miley" (twerking it like "miley")

porma'y inaanggulo (posing in an angle)

gwapong gwapo (very handsome)

pero bakit pungay ng kanyang mata kakaiba (but why are your eyes different)*

ang taray ng dating (the effect looks arrogant)

oh teka ate! (oh wait older sister!)

ano ba talaga? (what is it really?)

akala ko ay macho, ba't nilalabas ang dila? (i thought you are macho, why is your tongue out?)

kuya! nalilito na ako (older brother! i'm confused)

pero kahit ano pa… (but what ever it is...)

papa bakit nagpapabebe? (papa why are you trying to be spoiled?)

(chorus) [repeat]

(verse 1 & 2)

(chorus)

oh bebe wag pabebe (oh spoiled don't be spoiled)

huwag umarte ng di tama (don't act incorrectly)

baka mabebe bebe bebe bebe be beh buti nga! (you might be spoiled...) <not translating the next part because its a tagalog term that doesn't exactly translating into anything but the action "bleh", can be compared to "bleh bleh bleh bleh bleh you cannot catch me!" but not exactly>

(verse 3) [repeat]

(chorus)

(verse 3)

manahimik kayo walang makakapigil samin! (shut up no one can stop us!)

Okay, it was not fun to do. I honestly felt like I racked my brain in just finishing the whole thing. Further more I salute all the linguists that specializes in translating Tagalog (slang or not) into English and vice versa. I had to ask help using this website "Tagalog Lang" for some of the terms I don't normally encounter any direct english translation.

This experience is quite exhausting to do. Quite exhausting that it diminished the food I ate an hour ago into sweat, or the weather is just crazily humid right now. *laugh*

Either way. End point. There really is something distasteful about the music our current generation is releasing or composing. I can't avoid comparing it to the music of the later years, the years where I explored my taste for music. Saying that the music nowadays cannot be in par to the music then is true and unjust at the same time, because in the first place each music being released these days are not targeted for everyone. Just for the ones who will appreciate it, like almost all genre or types of medias released.

Hypocrite as I may sound, I feel compelled to abhor this song and wish that its fame would die a young death.

The Philippine music industry is not entirely dying, its just changing for the damn worse.

concept of media . misconception . suicide

Recently there was a local celebrity suicide and eventually she was still very young. I do not know who the actress was, and to put it honestly I'm very sorry for just discussing this one topic that got me related to her and artwork perception. On this note, even if her family will not see this, I will still say condolences to her family. But I believe that its injustice to myself if I don't say it out loud.

In my plurks list of friends there was one who posted saying that he/she was creeped out by the artworks this late actress drew. Eventually he/she sited the source of the artworks he/she has seen, view it here in this article. So I clicked on it and just found myself browsing to see how creepy everything was.

I was just curious about this said creepy artworks. However I was dismayed to see that several of the images listed in the site, artwork or not, included was to my opinion extremely normal and not even the least creepy. Truth be told I only felt creeped out because it belonged to a recently died girl. Mentally speaking I was psychologically hyping myself to how creepy it was if it belonged to a person that committed suicide, saying to myself "be brave young 'un". 'Lo and behold it was bad of me to expect highly of anything.

I'm not saying she is not talented. Believe me she has the skills, its even better than mine on several aspects. However to say in an article that these are "images were created due to depression" and such. I don't like assuming, and I know it is clear human nature to only see what we want to see. But there are so many things that could have happened AND is a possibility. IN THIS CASE, I will have to debunk my "not liking to assume" nature, because according to what I understand its the case of a misunderstood artist right here.

For one several of the featured artworks, according to my internet knowledge, are clear fan arts based from a popular internet franchise. One was even a clear fan art for Over the Garden Wall, which is by the way a good cartoon series, just don't let the creepy atmosphere deter you from the well executed story.

Theres even someone who explained what some of the said creepy depressing artworks were (and honestly I won't give a solid source because it came from someones facebook and I just hate linking it after it is now buried over all the other articles all those people in my list of friends just posted, oh que labour, too lazy) not her expression of being depressed but just honest to feels fangirl artworks. Talk about misunderstanding.

Those in the article are not depressing artworks, I felt though that those were well done fan arts and artworks that are in fact beautiful (love her style). I could not feel the depression in it, although those quotes might be a little misleading now that she's committed the suicide case. Damn circumstances.

Beyond that point only the unfairness of the misconception they have with her artworks and its bizarreness to me was the K.O.. A lot of people really thought her artworks reeked of depression because of this misleading article. Someones already trying to debunk it mind you, maybe a friend that knew what she really was. And I for one wish I could do the same.

My opinion about this case feels like a sore loser, but perception of alot of people cannot be changed. You can't blame the media for blowing up the whole thing just for a good story that would rouse up peoples opinions. Well played Mainstream Media. However it goes to show that there are several types of ignorance. My ignorance towards her life story is one of them. But you can also see how invasive the concept of Media is.

The ending will always be something we have no say at all. Honestly I feel dismayed because alot of people will be reading the article about her yet we truly do not know what happened or what she is. Except I will stand firm that those artworks do not say how depressed she is, but I won't assume she doesn't have any mental problems.